The third bowl

by Molly Rupert
 It was time to find out just why there is a third porcelain bowl in the bathrooms here in Cagli and most of Europe. Bowl #1- the sink. Bowl #2 - the toilet. Bowl #3 - the bidet.

The unusual looking contraption, with its multiple water spouts and shower-like attachments, is a standard in every restroom. American’s stretch bathrooms to fit larger showers and tubs, Italians add the third bowl.

I wasn’t sure how to use it beyond a general idea of how it worked. There is no manual and no instructions printed on the side of the bowl. So I did what anyone would do, I Googled it. There are MANY instructions in multiple formats, but the cartoon was my favorite. There are a lot of different ways to say bum!

After I stopped laughing, I got ready, took a deep breath and turned on the water. I made sure it wasn’t too hot… I like those parts down there and burns didn’t sound pleasant.

When the water was just the right temperature, I sat and let the bowl do it’s magic. I moved the spigot here and there to make sure I got the full experience. Sure enough, everything got wet.

Getting the water on your bum isn’t the problem _ the bowl does that for you _ but getting the water off and your bum dry is trickier. It takes some work. Toilet paper sticks _ a lot _ and there would be significantly more laundry if you used a towel each time you used the bidet.

While it was an interesting “cultural experience,” I am going to keep my big shower and leave the bidets here.